


One Love

by Sugaandspice



Series: Drugs & Candy [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Hurt No Comfort, Inspired by Music, M/M, No Fluff, No Smut, One Love by Marianas Trench, So much angst, Suga is sad, im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-08
Updated: 2017-06-08
Packaged: 2018-11-11 08:46:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11144970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sugaandspice/pseuds/Sugaandspice
Summary: "So don't stop, no stoppin it yetWhat if the one true love's the only one that you get?"





	One Love

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like this is really shitty, but I thought this song would go well with Miss Me.  
> This one is Suga's feelings and what happens after that so you should go read that first.
> 
> Most (not all) of what's in italics will be the lyrics from the song.

            Koushi shifted in bed and sighed. He felt paper thin, like he would rip in half if anything touched him.

            _“Just come back to bed.”_

He sounded strange so Koushi looked at him, his heart sinking as the image of his ex-boyfriend faded into a silhouette before dissipating into the air. He let out a cry, startling himself awake.

            He had forgotten Daichi was not there. He had forgotten Daichi would never be there again. He had forgotten Daichi had ended things with him.

            The day after they broke up Daichi came back and returned everything Koushi had ever given him. His heart only breaking more when he saw the clay penguin he had made Daichi in art class before they even started dating. Daichi refused to take any of his own things back which left Koushi with a broken heart and a room full of things that only made it ache more.

            He shut himself off from everyone; even his parents. Nothing could make the pain in his chest go away. When you go through a break up you’re supposed to turn to your best friend, but he didn’t know what to do because he hadn’t just lost his boyfriend, he had also lost his best friend. 

            He didn’t go anywhere expect for class and for the first week after their break up, he didn’t even go there. He didn’t get out of bed. Everywhere he looked was something Daichi touched. He couldn’t even look at himself in the mirror without breaking into tears.

            Eventually, Koushi forced himself to get up and get out. He started showering again, he went back to class, he went back to doing his homework, and tried to go out with friends. His heart was always heavy though. His friends were happy and all he ever did was drag them down. All he could even think of was the pain in Daichi’s eyes when they broke up. The shaking in his voice when he returned everything. The image of him that constantly came to him in his sleep.

            _What if the one true love is the only one that you get?_

Koushi was broken. He was unhappy and hurting and broken. People kept telling him to forget about Daichi, but it was hard. You don’t just “get over” the person you spent over four years of your life with.

            _“You need to get out of your room.”_

_“I've been broken but I'm better every day.”_

            “ _Don’t lie to me.”_

            _“I’m not lying.”_

_“Sugawara.”_

_“Yaku.”_

_“You’re not okay.”_

_“What if the one true love is the only one that you get?”_

Koushi got out of bed, deciding to just get up and get ready for class. He sat in the shower for an hour before bathing and getting out. He got dressed, pulling a sweater on so he could cover his hands and hide inside of it if he needed to.

            He left his dorm and walked outside to the quad, his heart leaping into his throat when he saw Daichi standing a few feet away. He blinked once and then Daichi was gone. It always happened this way, Daichi was there and then he was gone and Koushi couldn’t help but wonder if he was doing this to himself.

            He knew seeing Daichi was only making him worse, but he was always one to get attached to the people he loved and he loved Daichi more than anyone. He longed to be back in bed with the phantom image of Daichi now. It was the only time he saw his face and he knew he was sick because he always thought he was real. He was never real.

            No matter what he did he couldn’t shake the idea that he would never find love again. He’d heard so many stories from his family where the first person they fell in love with was the one that they married.

            _What if the one true love is the only one that you get?_

He could shake the idea that they were meant to be together. If they weren’t meant to be then they wouldn’t have been together for so long. They wouldn’t have had all of the adventures that they did.  It wouldn’t have hurt Daichi so much to end it. He wouldn’t hurt so badly now. If they weren’t meant to be then he would be happy and relieved, but he wasn’t. He was sad and broken and nothing he ever did was changing that.

            _What if the one true love is the only one that you get?_

Suga was lying in bed again, his eyes shut tightly as he tried to force all thoughts of Daichi out of his head. His subconscious seemed to have a mind of his own though and before he knew it Daichi was sitting on the foot of his bed.

            _“What if you still feel me too, still?”_

_**“I love you, but I can’t.”**_

**_“_ ** _What if there was still a way of taking care of this?”_

_**“There’s no way.”**_

**** _“What if I wake up tonight and you are real?”_

_**“I’m not real, Suga. I haven’t been real for months.”**_

**** _“What if we could find a way to try to heal?”_

_**“The only way to heal is to let go.”**_

**** _“What if there's no stopping us yet?”_

_**“We have to stop. We’ve already stopped.”**_

**** _“What if the one true love's the only one that you get? What if there was still a reason not to go? What if there was still a little bit of hope?”_

_**“I’m already gone.”**_

Koushi started to say something more, but Daichi shook his head before fading away once more.

            _“I'm just so sick, I thought you might be here, but you di-disappear!”_

            Koushi sobbed. He cried loudly, horrible sounding sobs that wrecked his whole body and made his throat burn. He was broken so far beyond repair and he wasn’t even sure if he was human anymore.

He wanted Daichi back. He knew he had fucked up, but he hadn’t meant to. Accidents happen and what happened was an accident. He needed Daichi. He couldn’t survive on his own. He could never survive on his own.

            Koushi cried. He punched his pillows and pulled his hair. He shoved things off his desk and threw his hairbrush at the mirror. He picked up the clay penguin and threw it at the door, sobbing louder when it shattered into pieces.

            He wanted to destroy everything Daichi had ever touched. He wanted to set fire to his skin and burn off everything Daichi had ever touched or kissed or held because as long as Daichi had held him he would never be able to cope.

            Daichi had promised him forever. He told Koushi he would always be there, that he was his best friend and even a million miles couldn’t separate them. **He promised.**

            Koushi sat down and picked up a few of the clay pieces, holding them in his hand as he sobbed. He still loved Daichi and he knew that wasn’t going to change and that, more than anything else, terrified him.

            _What if the one true love is the only one that you get?_


End file.
